OK, this was the episode that I was waiting for.
And while it was filled with arguing and drama, it left me feeling empty on the inside.
Maybe because they were fighting the same fight that they’ve rehashed all season long…maybe because there was no one to root for…
Maybe because I am angry I can’t actually punch Teresa in the face…
Whatever the reason, let’s hit the highlights…
The episode started exactly where last week’s left off, with the super awkward toast Teresa made at dinner. Saying how grateful and happy she was to get to spend time on the vacation with everyone except Kathy.
I honestly thought it was an oversight…BUT I believe that might be giving Teresa too much credit. She excluded Kathy from the toast, and a hundred bucks says she did it on purpose.
After the toast there were lots of silent moments and nervous glances…so leave it to Joe Gorga to try and lighten the mood with a little nakedness. He quickly strips and hops in the hot tub.
Just as soon as things were calming down, Kathy decides to talk to Teresa about Caroline. Honestly, was Kathy REALLY talking to Teresa about Caroline, or was she using Caroline as an excuse to get her feelings off her chest? Because Caroline seems fine “being on the outs”, it seems that Kathy is the one who doesn’t want to feel left out.
The women discussed Teresa and Carolyn’s relationship as if the rest of the group wasn’t 2 feet away, listening to every word. Gossip 101: Talk where no one else is within earshot. Duh.
Caroline managed to not address the conversation for about as long as she could handle, making comments from the sidelines that only Melissa and Jacqueline could hear.
When Teresa left the area to “change robes” Caroline decided she was ready to put her dukes up.
Here’s where the arguing started…and where Jacqueline decided to do the worst “fake-sleeping” act ever in history.
They continued to go back and forth about the magazine deals, the cookbook, the lack of apologies, the non-genuine apologies…
All the things we have heard 4 million times.
In the moment Teresa did seem like she was trying to apologize for the cookbook comments that referenced Caroline only being 1/16 Italian and talking about Christopher’s strip club car wash…but at that point Caroline was having none of it. She didn’t want to hear Teresa’s “sorry” because they were in front of the camera. Only a private conversation done off-camera will rectify this situation according to Caroline.
When talk of the tabloid stories came up it started to get good.
Caroline accused Teresa of selling stories to the tabloids, which Teresa sorta-kinda denied, but then said happened. BUT, in the background Juicy Joe started singing like a canary. He told the men that indeed, they did have a deal with InTouch magazine and they couldn’t help it that Teresa sold more magazines than every celebrity. In an abbreviated version of what he told the men, he said that they make the deal, the magazines say whatever they want and they collect the money. And no one should get upset about it because that’s what the magazines do…it’s not their fault.
Chris then tells Joe that Jacqueline was approached to write a story about Teresa and would get paid $50,000 to do it and she declined. Juicy slurred that he was a moron for turning down the deal…
Then Chris decides to get a little nugget off his chest in the form of Joe telling a bottling company that Chris was a “shady” businessman. Joe, half-denies it and then all the men start kissing each other. How Juicy didn’t get punched in the teeth is beyond me.
Back at the women’s argument they are still talking about the cookbook, Kathy gets her face yanked by Teresa and Albert continues to snore stealthy on the sidelines. Snooze.
Finally after going round and round and round, Juicy comes up and tells Teresa that they are going home because his “business” needs him. I wonder if Teresa knows what “business” means, because after last week’s phone call, business seems like it might mean a “half Spanish, part construction worker, lady lover”.
None the less, Teresa makes some weird squealing noises about how much she misses her girls and does a cartwheel back to her room.
Just when we think the drama is over, Teresa storms back into the room, swearing on her daughters that she has never said anything to the magazines about Caroline directly.
What she fails to understand is that by making the deal, and posing for the photographs, you KNOW that things will be said, and you’re condoning it to a certain extent.
There are so many way that Teresa could make the situation better…like, “Hey, yeah..so I posed for the magazines, and although I didn’t say those things directly, the magazine printed them and I still collected money. It’s dirty business, but I am broke and have a giant New Jersey mansion that I have to keep running. Please forgive me.”
That would literally be the end of the story.
But then things would probably be boring if we were dealing with sane people.
Finally Joe and Melissa feel the right thing to do is leave with Teresa and Joe and they all ditch Napa for a early flight back to The Garden State.
Next week, Caroline’s sister Dina makes an appearance, which should be interesting. Maybe we’ll get to the details behind the rift between Dina and Caroline.
Things I want to know…
- Whose side are you on? Teresa or Caroline?
- Is Kathy a peacekeeper or a manipulator?
- Did you agree with Jacqueline’s sleep it out technique?
- Does Caroline need to get over the cookbook stuff already?
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I’m on Caroline’s side, for sure. I think Teresa has just gotten too crazy with all of this. In the beginning of the show, like first season, I did like her, but the attention from the show made her crazy. Caroline does, however, need to just forget about all the Teresa drama – if she really doesn’t want a relationship with Teresa she shouldn’t hold a grudge or bring up the cookbook anymore. I do think that Kathy is being real but is just too nice to deal with Teresa’s crap. Jacqueline was somewhat smart to fake sleep, even though it was very obvious. She could have just gone to bed, but then she would have missed the juicy conversation.
LOVE your summaries! Keep ‘em coming!
1. I am totally on Caroline’s side. Although I don’t agree with her arguing technique, Teresa is CA-razy!
2. Kathy is a little bit of both, but I really like her, so I choose to look past it.
3. Jacqueline should have just left the room, she looked dumb fake sleeping. Especially because halfway through she sat up, yelled something, and then laid back down and closed her eyes.
4. I think Caroline is technically past the cookbook thing. I think she just disagrees with Teresa’s personality as a whole and it’s easy to blame the cookbook thing so she doesn’t have to be friends with her. I don’t blame her, I think Teresa is a lying, manipulative, all over BAD person.
1) team Caroline. Tre (BTW HATE that nick-name…should she be called tree…because she’s as dumb as one?) is bat-sh!t crazy. She seems to want loyalty from all her friends but she’s not so good with giving it back.
2) I think Kathy was really trying to make peace. She’s just not been on the show long enough to fake a coma a la Jacqueline. Was anyone else LOVING the Greg shots! The look on his face was priceless!!
3) I kind of agree with Jacqueline’s approach. But I think she should have done what Melissa did which was just sit there with her mouth closed and watch the train wreck. Playing possum was the cowards way out.
4) I think Caroline is past the cookbook thing. Honestly, I think that was the straw that broke the camels back. She’s heard for years Tre/tree bashing all of those family members she claims to love so much and I think it finally hit home that she’s not a nice person and she wants her gone.
1. I am totally Team Caroline! Teresa is a nutjob! Although I do feel bad for Teresa because her husband is a rude animal!
2. I do think Kathy was upset about being left out of the speech, so part of that may have inspired her talk with Teresa, but deep down Kathy really does want them all to be happy and get along.
3. While I definitely think Jacqueline wasn’t sleeping, she did the right thing by staying out of the argument. I don’t think she could have just sat by and watched it happen without getting involved.
4. I think the cookbook hurt Caroline when it came out, but now she’s over it. I think she was just done with everything, and let it all come to a head that night
I think they are all crazy and full of themselves. The show is like a train wreck you just can’t look away. Real housewives makes my dysfunctional family look normal. Most of the things that come out of Caroline and Teresa’s mouths make me laugh. I’m not on Caroline or Teresa’s side because it takes 2 for a relationship to fall apart. I will have to say that Caroline is getting on my nerves a little bit this season. I feel Kathy likes to stir the pot. I think they all like drama (subconsciously/consciously) or they wouldn’t be on this show. I think after a couple years the wives need to be replaced. Love your updates/recaps:)
I agree with Amy….they’re all nuts, but it’s fun to watch. I don’t think they’ll ever be able to find someone as crazy as teresa, because i think her husband has done a number on her. Did you see the after show where she talks about how happy they are?!!!! Are you kidding me? Did she not hear how her husband talked about her at the vineyard. She’s beyond hopeless. And there is no way anyone in america believes they’re happy.
I’m on Teresas side because she never really meant to hurt Carolines feelings but i guess she’s just too sensitive also main issue here is Dena.
Kathy likes crate drama cause well she has nothing to lose
Jack is real
Caroline needs to get over herself.
Caroline is diving me nuts this season. I start to roll my eyes every time she comes on the screen. This power trip that she’s on is getting old. Theresa has definitely got her issues, but I feel a little bad for her. Jacqueline seems to have kind of lost it. That “business” meeting at the restaurant a few weeks ago was embarrassing to watch. Kathy seems to like to stir up drama, which isn’t hard with this bunch of “ladies.” Andy Cohen had better invest in some combat gear for the reunion this reason, and hopefully he is getting hazard pay!
I’m on Caroline’s side FOR SURE. Although, this whole argument is getting really annoying. Theresa is dumber than a box of rocks and not even worth fighting with. Jaqueline’s “sleeping” was just plain stupid. If you don’t want to get in the middle of things or even be part of the conversation, go to your room. Go talk to your husband. Something! Kathy…I don’t think she’s manipulative but she really didn’t need to stir the pot. Everyone and their dog knows that Caroline doesn’t care about her friendship or lack there of, with Theresa so there’s no need to save something that’s just not there. Ooofta! I feel so much better now that I have an outlet for my RHWNJ anxiety! That episode was just a waste.
I am on Caroline’s side, I wish she would say how she feels in a different way. The book started it, I agree, but then the blindfold was lifted and she started seeing, as did I, Teresa in a whole new light. Her willingness to throw anyone under the bus to make a buck is sickening. How she has tried to turn everyone against Melissa and Kathy, and now she is faced with her actions and words, and lies in denying that she never said anything against them. I know that Caroline didn’t want to bring that up in front of them so they would face trouble when at least Melissa is making some headway, so it continues to be about the book, but just the way Teresa lives in a bubble and throws darts at everyone else makes me sick. As for Jaqueline sleeping, Teresa would have put her in the middle in a solid gold second, and knowing that, she stayed out of it, and Caroline understood that and had no problems with it, nor do I. Kathy is just sweet, and too scared to say how she really feels. I wish Rosy(ie?) was there, because she has no problem in calling things the way she sees them, I love her!!! I watched Watch What’s Happening after RHWNJ and I see how Caroline didn’t like herself, I’ve been there, you just wish you would have kept your big mouth shut, because people like Teresa feed off of drama, and will NEVER see when they are in the wrong. She always say that she never holds a grudge, bullpuckie!! I used to love Teresa, but somewhere along the line, maybe when they had us pronounce their last name differently, she changed, and not for the better. Fame became more important than friends, money more important than morals, and being right became more important than being real. Sad thing is, she will never see where she is wrong, and needs to communicate without the cameras or the magazines.